The World According to Cheryl B.

Mad, mad world.

2009-09-23T02:15:45Z

Folks are crazy.

We have to remember that when we interact with people on a day-to-day basis. Annie Le's death has truly disturbed me deeply. She was a student about to get married to the man she loved and it was all taken away in an instant five days before her nuptials. We all go about our daily lives and never imagine an innocent encounter with a co-worker could end so tragically.

"Why?" is a question that may never be answered. I doubt the lab technician who has been arrested will confess even if all the evidence points to his guilt.

I want to know what happened. I want to know WHY he felt it necessary to silence Annie Le permanently and take her away from her family and friends. What compelled him to strangle the life out of her and then discard her like a rag doll.

I honestly hope he gets a fair trial. More importantly, I hope if he's found guilty, he will confess and tell us WHY he ruined his life.

:)

2009-07-05T09:38:29Z

I'm so in love. It's real and pure. He's not perfect, but he's damn close to it.

If he were perfect, I don't think I'd dig him as much.

I never knew a smile could make me feel so blissful.

Even when he's screamin' like a crazy crazy, I'm annoyed but still madly in love.

I gaze into his eyes, kiss his soft lips, nuzzle his nose and feel content.

How did I get so lucky? How did all this come together so quickly and yet feel so right?

Peters rock.

I's FAT.

2009-06-09T02:05:01Z

Yesterday, my husband, 2.5-month-old son and I went to CVS to get some pics printed for the visiting grandparents. I actually went into the store and left the men in the car to wait. I was fluttering around looking for the right frame.

In the corner of my eye, I noticed an African man who took a special interest in me. He followed my movements and seemed mesmerized. I figured it wasn't me he was so taken with but my decolletage that emphasized my ENORMOUS lactating bOObies. It was a bit awkward so I gave him an obligatory smile and hello as if I were a celeb spied by a grateful fan.

He grinned even more and said "Jill Scott...has anyone ever told you that you look like Jill Scott?"

"No," I replied and scurried off.

Don't get me wrong, Jill Scott is exceptionally beautiful. She's one of the most attractive female entertainers of our time. Since I look NOTHING like Jill Scott (except maybe our complexion and we both rock natural do's), I could only guess my plump post-pregnancy body reminded him of the zaftig Jill Scott.

I was a bit crushed after that encounter. While pregnant, I hoped to pop out a baby and look pre-preggo after a month of breast feeding. Even though I am a relatively sane gal, my irrational brain parts sometimes expect life to be like the celebrity life I digest in my daily dose of Dlisted and Perez. I know celebs are real people that have real babies, but their journey and aftermath seem fake. It's as if they were wearing a little prop bump that was removed after the perfect unblemished baby was provided. We all know that excess money allows you daily food delivery services, personal trainers and 24-hour child care. However, it's easy to forget about that stuff when you're post-preggo chubby...and when some nice, well-meaning gentleman subtly calls you fat.

I guess I should be thankful he didn't call out "You sho' is ugly!"

Burris is buried.

2009-05-28T04:17:36Z

Senator Roland Burris is a freakin' idiot. Today, his taped conversations with disgraced former-Governor Blagojevich's brother were released. If you listen to these tapes, you will be outraged as an American. Sen. Burris seems to be agreeing to raise money for the governor in exchange for the open IL senate seat left by now President Obama. I know nothing of Burris' political or social record before this incident, but I know his seat will be tainted throughout his term. It's a shame that Obama's former seat is now a public embarrassment. He should never have been confirmed in the first place since Gov. B was already under investigation for trying to sell the seat. Before the tapes were released, he denied having such conversations with Gov. B's camp, but the tapes CLEARLY prove otherwise.

Senator Roland Burris, resign now!

Your legacy has been tarnished and your political career is over.

Go start a charity and call it a day.

It's over, dude.

So very sad.

2009-05-27T03:40:23Z

Mike Tyson's 4-year-old daughter, Exodus, died today after a tragic home accident. I still can't believe she died. I had seriously hoped and believed she would recover to see her family again. I know Mike and his family must be devastated. My heart goes out to all that knew and loved Exodus.

Such a sad, sad day.

"You punk white boy...I will fuck you till you love me, faggot!"

2009-05-26T03:27:20Z

That eloquent insult was spoken by my latest obsession - Former Heavy Weight Champion, Mike Tyson. Last week, my husband and I went to the documentary "Tyson," by James Toback. It was amazing. I remember Tyson coming onto the scene when I was in college. He may have been known earlier to most, but my first recollection was that the man who sounded like Minnie Mouse could kick some serious ass. Because of the way he spoke, I thought he was an absolute buffoon. I was baffled by his marriage to actress Robin Givens. Folks said she married him for his dough, which I too believed at the time. She was an educated, articulate, beauty and he was an uneducated, inarticulate, brute. Why would he marry someone he knew would not accept him before he became the multi-millionaire HWC? Con-foo-zed? Me too, until I watched "Tyson."

"Tyson," completely changed my perception of this tortured soul. Mike is not an idiot, but an articulate, sexy, kind, and vulnerable man with a touch of brutishness. I see why Robin was taken with him. There is something intriguing about a man who can handle THE business in the boudoir and also physically annihilate another human being. Let's be clear: screw and annihilate, not make love and defend. It's a basic animalistic appeal with no sophistication to quell our most hedonistic desires. In the movie, Mike Tyson states he likes strong, professional, modern women who he can dominate in the bedroom. Many modern women, like me, want to be dickmatized and just relinquish control to be pleasured. You must also be adored and know you are IT. In addition, we also want to know that our man can physically intimidate anyone who may want to harm us. However, we don't want or expect to be the brunt of our man's aggression. In real life, such men domestically use their fists instead of their words.

Even though I'm uncharacteristically attracted to the older and wiser Mike Tyson, I know I could never be with someone like him. He is too unpredictable and tormented by his turbulent teen-hood. He does not trust and cannot accept love. (His analysis, not mine.) I could not respect nor love a man who could not use his mind and his words to handle me, or an uncomfortable situation. A Heady Wise Champion, who can screw and also make love, is the ultimate prize, no?

I'm frakkin' blogging!

2009-05-25T22:19:03Z

This is my very first entry. I will be speaking quite freely about my likes, dislikes, observations and experiences related to "Life According to Cheryl."

For now, I would like to share something that happened to me today. After doing the SM stairs with my husband, we went for a short walk around the block. A tall, black man was walking his dog and headed toward us. I could tell he was handsome (handsome boys have that swagger), but couldn't verify this fact until he was before us. Once I saw his face, I was in pure heaven. I had finally spotted a cylon!

"Hey, you're the cylon from BSG!" He stopped and turned around cautiously in case we were crazy humaniods who needed to avenge the destruction of the 12 colonies. The handsome man was "Number Four", aka, "Simon," the ONLY black cylon character from BATTLESTAR GALACTICA. I was seriously in awe. BSG (and SIX FEET UNDER) are my favourite TV series of all time.

We chatted him up a bit. I told him my husband had downloaded the entire series for me to watch. I was a new fan and was disappointed the ONLY black cylon seemed to disappear from the series. I was still waiting for a sistah to appear, but all twelve models of cylons were accounted for dagnabit. He told us not to fret since they will be producing a movie from the cylons POV. Finally we will get to know more about the cylons who appeared less frequently. What the hell were they doing when we had to watch "Kara Thrace" annoyingly purse her lips during every scene to emote depth...or was it sexiness? Can't wait to enjoy my BSG time again. So sad it came to an end, but happy it concluded with such grace and beauty. Frakkin' spectacular.